Recently, I
was sent to the Bishop’s Office. By God’s grace I survived to tell about it.
It reminds
me of a “traumatic” experience from my childhood – the time I was called into
the Assistant Principal’s office.
I’m in Junior High School. My mom buys
me new gym shoes that are to be worn only for gym class. At the end of class, I
place them in my basket in the locker room and make sure the combination locker
is set. The next week when I go to gym class, the shoes are missing. I tell my
mom about it when I get home from school. I tell her my shoes were locked up,
but now they’re missing. She’s upset because we just spent a lot of money for
those shoes. The next day while I’m at school, my mom calls the school office
and complains.
I’m in math class when someone brings
a red note to the teacher. The teacher comes over to me and says, “The
Assistant Principal would like to see you.” My hand starts shaking immediately.
The Assistant Principal is a big man with a deep voice. He’s the one shouting
at kids to behave in the lunch room. He’s the one who administers corporal
punishment to misbehaving students. I say, “Are you sure, he wants to see me?”
The teacher says, “Yes. It’s you.”
I have no clue why the Assistant
Principal wants to see me. I couldn’t think of anything I might have done
wrong. I’ve always been a “goody two shoes”. I am a first born rule-follower
and people-pleaser. But the Assistant Principal wants to see me.
I walk down the hallway to his office
taking shallow breaths. When I sit down in his office, my hand shakes like I
have tremors. I’ve never been this close to this imposing man behind the desk.
Of course, the Assistant Principal
wants to talk to me about those missing gym shoes. Unfortunately, he is not
gentle with this terrified boy. He makes me feel like I am the criminal.
Fortunately, I never had to return to
that office.
I thought of that experience when I
opened up my mail on August 29th. It was a letter from the Bishop’s
office. It said, “You are asked to come to the Bishop’s office on October 2nd,
2014 at 10:00 a.m.” The letter explained that it was the first meeting in the
supervisory response process. A complaint had been filed against me for
officiating at my daughter’s same sex wedding on August 17th. It is
a chargeable offense according to the United Methodist Book of Discipline.
In the weeks to follow, I heard about
another pastor in the Detroit Conference who was going through the same process
as myself for a wedding he performed in June. He told me, “I’ve invited my
friends and supporters to join me in prayer at the Area Center a half hour before
our meeting. You can join them if you’d like.” I did.
As my own ‘big day’ draw near, I
began to let more people know about my situation. I said, “I need you to pray
for me and for our meeting.” I invited a few of them to pray with me at the Area
Center before the meeting.
I had just entered the Facebook world
the month before. I was starting to build a list of friends. I posted a brief
notice there inviting people to pray for me as I met the Bishop.
Before I went to bed the night before
my meeting, I checked my Facebook site. I couldn’t believe all the people who
sent me a message telling me they were praying for me. I copied off a list of
all the personal notes that were sent. I put it with my material I was going to
share with the Bishop. It would remind me I was not alone.
That night as I was trying to sleep,
I thought of all those people praying. I imagined their prayers like a cushion
surrounding me. I was able to relax and trust that God would use this process
to bring some good out of it.
When I arrived at the Area Center on
October 2nd, I was pleasantly surprised to find over a dozen friends
and supporters in the meeting room. They greeted me with warm hugs. Soon I stood
in the center of the circle. They laid their hands on me and prayed. As they
were praying, I could literally feel the weight of their love and concern
pressing on me. I was surrounded by this cushion of prayers.
Fortunately, the trip to the Bishop’s
office was nothing like my earlier trip to the Assistant Principal’s office.
Bishop Deb was gracious, soft-spoken and kind. She allowed me to share my
questions and my message. She listened carefully and caringly.
We are in the midst of working toward
a ‘just resolution’. Pray that God will bring good for all people out of this
process.
P.S. If you were one of those people
who prayed, thank you!
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